


We could see only possibilities

by Ilrona



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, And makes sure no Imperial remnant can gain power, Established Relationship, M/M, So the First Order can't rise, Where the Republic listens to Leia Organa after the war
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-01
Updated: 2016-07-01
Packaged: 2018-07-19 11:40:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7359796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ilrona/pseuds/Ilrona
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a galaxy with no First Order, Ben Organa-Solo is still curious about the dark side of the Force and the shadowy figure that used to appear in his childhood dreams, willing to travel even to Moraband, the desolate planet of the Sith, to try to learn more about how to master the Dark. Ben is also more than willing to date Hux (the Imperial weirdo, as Han calls him) despite his bitter hatred of the New Republic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We could see only possibilities

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from the lyrics of ‘Speed the Collapse’ by Metric.

This is only the fourth biggest spaceport on Hosnian Prime, but it’s still one of the most crowded places Ben has ever seen. The Millennium Falcon is almost ready to leave. Ben hands Chewie the last box of nonperishable food, who thanks him with a small growl.

There are four colorful holoposters on the wall around him: one with the details of a dejarik championship (the reward will be announced later, depending on the number of participants), a travel agency encouraging people to visit the ‘breathtaking bountiful beauty’ of Naboo, a very official-looking something about the Senate, and an advertisement for Bantha Burger (only ten credits, and you get a free drink if you can answer at least seven out of ten questions about the Galactic Civil War).

“So which planets are you going to visit?” Ben asks, once he gets bored of the posters.

His father is looking through the contents of a medpac while he answers, shaking one of the bacta patches to check it isn’t leaking.

“They don’t have names, or at least the New Republic doesn’t know their names. There are many planets out there in the Unknown Regions we don’t know anything about. We have to check that there’s no suspicious Imperial activity there. Signs like ships flying to or from, or Imperial-looking settlements. If we see anything weird we have to make a report and they will send more forces to check it out.”

Sounds like a thankless job, Ben thinks. “What is the Senate expecting to find?”

When Han is finished with the medpac he gives it to Chewie, who nods before walking into the Falcon. “Most of the senators aren’t expecting to find anything. They think Leia is paranoid. But I don’t think so. You weren’t even born then, but the Empire was willing to do _anything_ , and even if it’s defeated now, there are some who want to bring it back. So we’re making sure they’re not trying to make another Death Star or clone army or something even worse.” There’s a small pause. “Speaking of which: Are you still dating that Imperial weirdo?” As much as Ben knows his dad is trying to be supportive, Han can’t stop a little bit of his distaste seeping into his tone.

“Come on, dad, he’s not that bad,” Ben scowls, even though he knows Hux is sort of the worst. “I know mom hates him, but mom is always so overdramatic when it comes to politics. So Hux is sad about the fall of the Empire, and a bit dissatisfied with the Senate’s work. That doesn’t make him the worst thing to ever happen to the galaxy.”

“No, no, of course not,” Han tries to placate him. “Your mother is just a little worried…”

“Oh, yes, _worried_ ,” Ben spits out the word as if it was soaked with Quell toxin. “Like Uncle Luke is worried about my red lightsaber. I know he thinks it’s proof that I’m worse than every Sith Lord that has ever lived put together, though he likes to pretend he’s _fine_ with me.”

“He’s just disappointed that you left his school. You’re very strong in the Force, and he could have taught you a lot more.”

“I mean no offense to Uncle Luke, but I can find a better teacher.”

Han just looks at him sadly, like that’s exactly what he’s afraid of.

* * *

A splash of bright green light appears on Hux’s left cheek as the shabby little cantina carelessly throws its decorative lighting onto its denizens. Ben gently rubs his nose against it. Their knees knock together as Ben moves even closer to him. The lighting changes, now painting Hux’s soft lips a sweet shade of blue.

The cantina is far from the center of Eriadu City, in an area a lot less fancy than the streets near Seswenna Hall. Nobody seems to be paying them any attention. Everyone is drinking and laughing and playing sabacc (the ones playing sabacc laugh either more or a lot less than the others).

“How’s work at Sienar-Jaemus? Any interesting new models?”

Hux scoffs. “I quit last month. It’s the Senate’s fault. They have all these rules that restrict what we can build, and how many we can build. Even the materials! There was this representative of the Senate constantly breathing down our neck.” Here Hux changes his tone, trying to mimic the representative of the Senate. It’s quite likely that Hux is unflatteringly exaggerating the annoying shrillness of their voice. “No, you can’t make more than ten TIE fighters per month! What do you need more durasteel for? What do you mean you want to make better hulls? Why are you trying to invent new things? What is technological progress, I have never heard of it! It sounds like an evil Imperial thing, therefore the Senate forbids it! For the greater good of the galaxy!” Now Hux continues in his own voice. “That was her favorite phrase. The greater good of the galaxy! That’s what she answered with every time I told her she’s limiting our work. What does the Senate know about the greater good of anything but their own interests? I was so close to just shooting her with my blaster, but the Senate would have just sent another one. Now I work for the Seswenna Sector Bank, but I don’t know how long that will last. You should feel very glad I'm still dating you even though your mother's meddling makes my life about a million times more difficult than it should be.”

A bartender droid rolls to their table, its optic scanner fractured. They order their cocktails quickly; Hux with the easy and comfortable routine of someone who comes here quite often. Ben asks for the same as Hux.

“I know you hate my mom, but not even you can really blame her for being so strict. After what happened to Alderaan no wonder she’s trying to prevent another war.”

“Yes, yes, poor Alderaan.” Hux rolls his eyes. “It’s always Alderaan. Will the New Republic ever shut up about Alderaan?”

“It was one of the greatest tragedies in the galaxy,” Ben scolds him, because that’s what he’s supposed to do, being the son of the last Princess of Alderaan, but even he can hear the half-heartedness in his voice, more obligation than true outrage at Hux’s uncaring tone. “Don’t speak so lightly of it.”

“Yes, it was a great tragedy,” Hux admits, somewhat reluctantly. “I’m not saying it wasn’t. It’s just that it gets so fucking tiring when every single anti-Imperial propaganda is like ‘Oh, those evil Imperials, blowing up that poor planet, how awful!’. I mean, come on, it was a war. People get killed in a war, a lot of them if it’s as big as the Galactic Civil War was. That’s how wars work. But the Empire didn’t destroy Alderaan just because it could. It was a necessary step in the war.”

Ben knows what he’s supposed to say, what his family would want him to say. That Alderaan was a planet full of civilians. That in a war the only thing necessary is to protect ourselves and our loved ones. That what happened to Alderaan was senseless destruction, nothing else.

He thinks about his mother’s eyes wet with unshed tears as she talked about her lost Alderaan. Once, when Ben was very young, she described the groves in the valley near the royal palace filled with the mouthwatering scent of her favorite fruit, the starblossom, sweet sticky juice running down her fingers and spilling onto her fancy princess’s dress, her father grinning, gently wiping her hands while her mother gathered as many fruits as she could into her basket.

Still, Ben thinks (not that he would ever tell his mom, or anyone else)… it’s not that blowing up Alderaan was an acceptable thing, of course not, but. But there are uncountable other planets in the galaxy. And people die. Everyone dies one day. Every person on Alderaan, every animal and every plant too, would have died sooner or later. Much later, perhaps, but the day would have come. Certainly the Force wouldn’t have allowed the planet to be destroyed if it was truly something the galaxy could not survive without…

The droid comes back with the drinks. The two thick glasses don’t look the cleanest, but the cocktail itself, a strange yellowish-greenish color with sparkling flecks floating inside, is good. Ben likes to watch Hux drink, holding the drink inside his mouth for a bit instead of swallowing it down quickly, enjoying the taste.

“Have you heard about the death of Chancellor Villecham?” Ben asks, the first thing that comes to his mind.

“Yes, of course. It was all over the news for several days. I had nothing to do with it.”

“When did I even imply you had anything to do with it?”

“I guess you didn’t.” Hux pops one of the berries in the cocktail into his mouth. “Well, I’m certainly not mourning him. Villecham was incompetent, foolish and cowardly. He claimed to support peace, yet he didn’t have the backbone to stand up against your warmongering mother and her political allies who do everything they can to crush us. Still, there would have been no point killing him: there will always be another Chancellor. A few members are easily replaced, and the machine of the Senate, even though it’s a machine which is absolutely incapable of doing its job, won’t stop working as long as they can quickly throw another useless representative into a vacant seat. The only solution with a meaningful result would be to wipe out the whole institution, but that’s easier said than done. We don’t even have enough money to buy new blasters, let alone to get rid of the whole worthless Senate.”

Shit, Ben thinks with amusement, he’s definitely not going to mention this to his mom when she asks Ben how his boyfriend is.  He’s also not going to mention that Hux is now working for the Seswenna Sector Bank: he wouldn’t put it past Leia Organa to try to shut down the whole bank somehow only because Hux is an employee there.

“Because listen here, Ben,” Hux puts the half-empty glass down. Ben listens, curious. “I know you’re all about the Force, and how it’s so significant, and how the world is made of the Force or whatever. But. You know what? _Money_ is the greatest power in the galaxy, not the Force. If you have enough credits, you can buy and create anything you want. If you don’t, you have nothing. It’s that simple. If we had money, we could have weapons. Better, more powerful weapons than the ones used by the Empire! We could have an army to take back what was stolen from us by the Republic!”

Ben decides to not bother trying to enlighten Hux about how the Force _is_ actually the most significant thing in the galaxy; even on planets that don’t have any kind of currency the Force is always there, boundless and eternal, surrounding everything.

“Even if you had a lot of credits, where would you find an army big enough to defeat the New Republic? Most people would rather live peacefully, even if they have to deal with some awful taxes, instead of dying on a battlefield.”

“Well, soldiers are hardly ever voluntarily drafted,” Hux explains. Without any colorful lights falling onto his face at this moment, his eyes are pale, almost colorless, like a frozen lake on some ice planet. Cold, cruel eyes. Ben shivers with delight.

“That’s true. Okay, but what if they rebel against you, because they’re afraid to die, wanting to go back to their families? And you would have to teach them how to fight, since most of them have never even seen a blaster, let alone know how to use one.”

“I don’t know,” Hux sighs. Suddenly he looks so very forlorn, as if he’s teetering on the edge of despondency, a chasm he doesn’t want to fall into likely only because he doesn’t want to seem weak in front of Ben. “But we could have made it work. We had ideas. Glorious plans. We had to flee after the fall of the Empire, you know. I was just a child, so I don’t remember the details, but I know we used to have such magnificent visions of the future. And look where we are now… Nowhere.”

Ben isn’t certain what this ‘we’ is that Hux is constantly referring to. Is there some secret group of militant Imperials wishing for nothing but to sink their revenge-hungry teeth into the soft underbelly of the New Republic and gnaw at it until it dies? If there is, Hux is keeping it a secret from Ben. He seems to find Ben entertaining enough to want to hang out with him sometimes, and the sex is very good, but it’s painfully clear that he doesn’t trust Ben. Which makes sense, since Ben is, after all, the son of Leia Organa, one of the politicians responsible for stopping the Military Disarmament Act and creating all the laws that make it impossible for the Empire to be rebuilt, and his dad and uncle are great Rebel heroes as well.

“Well, you have me, at least,” Ben says, winking playfully to make it clear that he’s just kidding, even though he sort of means it, actually.

“You’re somewhat cute, at least sometimes, and you have the biggest dick I have ever had, but. Ben, look. I wanted to become the fucking Emperor when I was a kid. Just let me be bitter about this disgusting farce of the New Republic ruling the galaxy without making me listen to your lame jokes.”

“Whatever,” Ben says. He doesn’t feel like apologizing. He very rarely does. He presses a small kiss to the corner of Hux’s eye, reflecting the now bright red color of the ever-changing lights. Ben shivers when he feels a little puff of breath against his cheek as Hux huffs, then Hux kisses him, the taste of the cocktail bittersweet on his tongue.

* * *

There’s not enough place on top of the mountains, nothing but shard-sharp peaks and steep paths barely big enough for the two of them, to land there with the shuttle. So they have to leave it at the foot of the mountain, near some red rocks, wind-beaten and devoid of any vegetation, not even weak little shrubs or flowerless cactuses seem to be able to find a home in this blood-red, lifeless soil.

Ben can’t sense even the faintest echo of the presence of other living beings in the region other than the two of them. It’s expected, of course, from an abandoned planet so desolate and having such a bad reputation, but there’s something unsettling about the… emptiness of Moraband nevertheless.

“Can you feel the power shivering in the air?” Ben whispers, awestruck and afraid. The legends and old records – how terrified Uncle Luke would be if he knew about Ben reading such forbidden writings! – were unable to prepare Ben for actually experiencing the overwhelming amount of raw, unfiltered Force belonging to the Dark saturating the thin, dry air of the planet. “I can almost taste it on my tongue. My heart beats so hard. I know you’re not Force-sensitive, but can’t you feel… something?”

“I can feel how hungry I am,” Hux says, panting, pushing the words out of his mouth with some difficulty. “There’s a cave there, can’t we stop for a bit?”

“Okay,” Ben nods, quickening his steps. The entrance of the cave is a dark hole in the harsh red mountainside that resembles the yawning or screaming mouth of a blood-soaked face.

To be honest, he’s somewhat impressed by how little Hux is complaining. For a man who seems to have spent most of his life sitting in an office revising spacecraft blueprints, reading through bank accounts and fruitlessly hating the Republic, he’s doing well at their physically exhausting trip. They have been walking for several hours on this hard terrain with very little rest.

The cave is small and empty and dark. Ben throws the heavy backpack onto the dust (he didn’t want to ask skinny, small-shouldered Hux to carry it and Hux didn’t offer his help) and sits down next to it. First he pulls the camping lamp out and turns it on, which illuminates almost the entire cave, then he finds the canned food. He gives Hux a five-fish Arkanisian stew.

“So have you found any clue that would help solve your childhood dreams?” Hux asks after he stops eating with the desperate frenzy of someone who has been starving for weeks.

“Not yet,” Ben sighs, eating a spicy-honey ikopi stew with a bit more dignity. “Maybe there’s nothing here. The Knights of Ren are not Sith, after all.”

“Are you sure? Just because you couldn't find the name in some ancient Sith database or whatever doesn’t mean they can’t be Sith.”

“The Rule of Two makes that very unlikely.” Ben accidentally bites down on one of those bitter seeds in the stew he hates, but he doesn’t want to spit it out like a child. He swallows it instead. “With the Sith there’s only one master and one apprentice. In my dreams, there were seven Knights of Ren: I was the leader of the six others, but I don’t believe the others were my apprentices – all seven of us had the same master, I think. A faceless figure dressed in shadows, sitting on a throne.”

“Of course you dreamed that you were their leader,” Hux scoffs at him, though his eyes reveal amusement instead of true derision.

“You wanted to be the Emperor, you don’t get to judge me for this!” Ben shots back. “And anyway, those dreams weren’t really my own. They were sent by someone else. The one who should have been my master. A shapeless, nameless being of the Dark, who promised me power and the possibility to become stronger and better under his tutelage than what the Jedi could offer to me, with their countless restrictions and rules. But one day the dreams stopped.”

Hux, already finished with his stew and now chewing a blumfruit bar, remains silent.

The voice that suddenly appears in Ben’s mind doesn’t belong to Hux. The new presence, which feels like a malicious shadow falling onto the landscape of his mind as the air around him thickens with the Dark, becoming almost suffocating, is unfamiliar to him.

_Leave!_

He can’t see anything now. Did the camping lamp break somehow?

“Who are you?” Ben asks from the impenetrable darkness around him.

_You don’t deserve to know my name. I belong to this planet. You do not. You taint the sand with your unworthy footsteps._

“Are you a Sith?” Worry and excitement both twist around in his stomach. “Can you help me how to use the dark side of the Force?”

 _No!_ The voice sounds both indignant and threatening. Ben’s fingers twitch for his lightsaber, but he isn’t certain he could fight against whoever or whatever the voice is. _You could never become a Sith. You do not have what it takes. Even if your Master was still alive, you still wouldn’t be a Sith._

“But I’m so much closer to the Dark than to the Light! My lightsaber is red! Even if I can’t become a Sith, I have too much potential to not have the chance to master the Dark! I’m the strongest Force-user in the galaxy since my grandfather. What do you want me to do? Should I kill someone? I could kill anyone!”

The voice laughs with derision. Ben feels like a humiliated child, and he grits his teeth in anger as the voice speaks again in the darkness. _Anyone can kill! You don’t understand it, child, if you think simply killing others is the meaning of the Dark. Many pages of the history of the galaxy were – will be – could have been painted red with the blood of billions by those who don’t have anything to do with the Force. Now I will tell you again: Leave! If you won’t, you will stay here forever._

There’s suddenly a rumbling sound, like a crash of thunder or a mountain breaking in two, and the light of the camping lamp appears again.

There are other beings in the cave, moving closer to the two of them – all Ben can see from the corner of his eye is Hux scrambling to his feet and grabbing his blaster before the first creature attacks Ben.

Ben turns his saber on. The shivering red blade severs a four-eyed, dark head off, razor-sharp black teeth glinting in a mouth opened wide just before the creature’s death. That’s all he can take stock of before the next one comes. It tries to swipe at him with a creepily long limb that Ben can’t decide is an arm or a leg, and he dodges swiftly before he skewers it through its torso, the awful, exhilarating stench of burned flesh bitter in his nostrils.

There’s another monster lying at Hux’s feet with several blaster holes in its chest, its limbs still twitching in its final throes. Another lunges at Hux from behind, but Ben uses the Force to freeze its body. Hux turns around, and Ben feels a sweet flare of pride in his chest at Hux’s awed expression as he stares at the unmoving body suspended mid-movement. Hux recovers quickly, firing at the body several times.

The last remaining beast lumbers towards them. Ben keeps the sword steady in front of him. He doesn’t have the strength yet to freeze this one too, but he can still use his saber.

The creature moves suddenly, quicker than expected, too quick. Ben cuts off one limb but another manages to catch Hux’s shoulder, and Ben watches with a sinking heart as the claws slide through the pale grey jacket into vulnerable flesh, the torn fabric quickly darkening with blood. Hux cries out. His body wavers but remains standing.

“Fine!” Ben shouts angrily as he cuts the monster’s head off, satisfaction welling up inside his heart as the body that dared to cause Hux pain falls down into the dirt, dead. “We’ll leave!”

* * *

“I just thought about something really cool.” Ben finds the small curve of Hux’s ass and squeezes teasingly.

Hux grumbles. “Don’t even think about putting your huge dick into me again tonight. Once was quite enough, thank you.”

Ben grins, his hand sliding between Hux’s cheeks, brushing his thumb over the messy hole, barely managing to stop the satisfied groan when he feels the filthy wetness of his come leaking out. “That’s quite ungrateful from someone who couldn’t stop whining for my huge dick just a minute ago.”

“I wasn’t whining,” Hux complains, quietly moaning in discomfort as Ben presses just the tip of his thumb inside, too oversensitive. Ben withdraws, resting the questing hand instead on the small of Hux’s back.

“No, no, of course not. You were very articulately and with a lot of dignity begging for my dick. Whatever. Anyway, I just thought about this dejarik championship on Hosnian Prime, and that you could take part in it. You’re the best dejarik player I‘ve ever met, and I think playing only ever with me is a waste of your talent.”

“What makes you think you’re the only one I play dejarik with?”

“Is there anyone else?”

There’s a small pause, then Hux mumbles, a little sullenly: “No.”

“I think you have the chance to win. I know it’s not as grand as being the Emperor of the galaxy, but it would still be pretty cool. And the winner gets a lot of credit. Probably not enough to build your dream army to crush the New Republic beneath your boots, but it’s still money. You always say you don't have enough money."

“I’ll think about it,” Hux says, then he smiles a little, smug. “I certainly am brilliant at dejarik.”

Ben wiggles in the one small bed they have in their little shuttle, to get more comfortable and also to get even closer to Hux’s pliant, exhausted, well-fucked body.

“Maybe my dad could help us find more information about your grandfather and his powers,” Hux says. “He’s interested in the Force, though only theoretically, since he has as much Force-sensitivity as I have. He has researches about both the Jedi Order and how they taught the children and Darth Vader’s powers and his role in the Empire. Perhaps he could help you find out more about your grandfather, maybe even your mysterious knights. I don’t know, maybe it won’t help you much, but I think it’s worth a shot. Come visit our home on Arkanis whenever you have the time.”

“Thank you,” Ben smiles. He doubts that a not Force-sensitive Imperial officer can have a lot of useful information, but he’s nevertheless touched by Hux wanting to help him. And who knows? Certainly Hux’s father has more knowledge than what Uncle Luke is willing to tell Ben about his own grandfather. “And thank you for coming to Moraband with me. That was really cool of you.”

There’s a bacta patch on Hux’s shoulder, but the wound will heal in a few days. It was ugly and there was a lot of blood, but luckily the injury is not deep, and there won’t be any lasting effects.

“Only because you said I’m too cowardly and boring to go,” Hux admits. “And I wanted to prove you wrong.”

“What?” Ben exclaims, pretending to be scandalized, acting as if he didn’t know this already. “Does that mean you would come and dance with me on the annual gala celebrating the victory of the Rebellion on Hosnian Prime if I told you that you don’t want to go because you’re afraid of all those Senators?”

“Fuck off, Ben.”

Ben smiles at him and rubs his lightly-freckled arm soothingly, until Hux relaxes: frown disappearing, lips no longer pressed tightly together, eyes slipping closed.

Ben wonders who the voice in that cave on Moraband was. Some arrogant asshole of a Sith Lord, no doubt. It mentioned that Ben’s – the Knights of Ren’s – master is dead. That must mean that he was real, and not just an imaginary friend of a child too strong with the Force and with a linage too grand and too confusing to make sense of. But if that shadow in his childhood dreams is truly no longer alive…

Should he give up?

But he can’t. He has too much potential to let it waste away. He abandoned Uncle Luke’s school because he knew – like the dreams told him – that his destiny is mastering the Force so that he can become more powerful than anyone else. He wasn’t satisfied with using it only to levitate rocks and heal scrapes, to meditate and think about harmony and serenity and all that useless philosophy. No. Ben is meant to be so much more than that. He has no idea how, and what the price will be. He’s alone with no guide, nobody’s apprentice.

But he won’t give up, he promises himself as he looks at Hux’s face, glad that at least he’s here with Ben. He will find the way to the Dark one day. Surely it will be worth it in the end, whatever it may take. He can't squander the gift the Force has given him, the potential to become as great and powerful as his grandfather.

But before that, he will be there on Hosnian Prime to cheer Hux on so he can win that dejarik championship.


End file.
